Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

inner most thoughts

June 30, 2007

What a month this has been, such a hard emotional frustrating 4 weeks…. I want to just go on holiday for ever and ever.
Since Grandma moving in there has been so much happen one minute she is ok next she has a panic attack not good as you can imagine, took her doctors and wow we could start a chemists shop between us the amount of tablets we both have, I’m struggling at the moment no time to my self and my husband .. love him to pieces but i haven’t been in our bed for a month because, our daughter doesn’t have a room and she wants me to sleep with her down stairs…. she’s 7 so i said yes, tell me who wouldn’t .
I love having Grandma around but its so hard im not used to the attention she gives me or the telly up so loud i cant hear my self think i am glad she’s here but something has to change or im gonna explode I’ve been blocking my feeling up i can see that now and i get so angry at nothing i guess im stressed…..Grandma is 84 im 29 we get on so great but its so hard cooking cleaning etc im worn out then to add insult to it all she tell me off lol

Grandma is so sweet i never new such a strong person before. im going to get her life history onto paper as she has seen so much in her life and had injured so much pain loosing her dad seeing it loosing her daughter in law then her son all gone and withen years and having one relative left a grandson in uk mile from usa

lost in the world

June 11, 2007

how i feel right now
Grandma is settled but boy has it been a hard two weeks what with a kitten an 84yr old and a 7yrold wow , grandma got some moves she has more stamina than i.

I’m not going to lie it is hard and frustrating looking after all 3 Grandma is just like an extra child in a silly sort of way but she does chelsey the world of good her great granddaughter.
I’m having a tough time with my tablets and god i want some boobs :( sigh me daughter will be bigger than me aint fair i feel like a waste of a women well in my eyes a girl…

being that grandma is here i find it hard to write my thoughts down privacy and all that so till next time xxx behave n love ya self crikey i should head my advice…..

June 2, 2007

where do i begin its been a hectic week Grandma arrived and settled in but wow what a difference….. im shattered but my daughter is over the moon
Her flight was ok til she got on home soil not one person helped her with her bags even thoe we had phone prior to her landing

May 8, 2007

she’s coming home

May 7, 2007

we have sorted it she will be flying in at the end of the month wow what a turn around going to take some getting used.
My nerves are shaking and I’m so scared but we cant leave her things will be tight but we’ll survive and as for my own problems oh my i don’t know…
I’m scared nervous and happy

My dreams

May 7, 2007

My dreams are mad I keep seeing the same things I’m in a house with no escape no windows no doors yet the walls move like pillars just enough to get through then I’m in the middle of a war zone bombs everywhere so I run down the hill away from it all onto a beach heading towards the caves and through I go not looking back its dark and gloomy but I see a bus well tram actually I jump on it and watch the beach move away the place I’m heading to looks like Amsterdam only when I get there I’m in a bar type disco place and I’m searching for him but he isn’t there
I ask I explore finding it difficult to move around so many people yet none are him.

May 4, 2007

May 3, 2007

the ad network

May 3, 2007

May 2, 2007


Dreaming of a better way